Check out this excerpt of a thoughtful email I received from someone in The Story community:
…if I am driving and I ask God to protect me while I’m driving, if it is in His will for a car accident to happen, won’t a car accident happen anyway? And how in the world would I pray, “God, if it is in your will, help align my heart so that I am okay with getting into a car accident?”
And how do you keep faith when prayer after prayer seems to go unanswered? Skeptics would say that they are going unanswered because God is not real, and Christians would say it went unanswered because He has a different plan in mind for us. So if our prayers are answered, we get to say “See, God is real!” but if they are not answered, we still say “See, God is real!” I was raised in a Christian household and was atheist for a while before getting baptized several years ago, but I remember when I was atheist it would irritate me so much when Christians said that, because then there is no way for them to “lose” the debate.
I am so appreciative of these questions because they articulate not only what so many others have been feeling about prayer, but the doubts I’ve had in the past, too. Before I became a believer, I used to point out this same perceived incongruency. There used to be a popular internet meme that said, “Arguing with a Christian is like playing chess with a pigeon. No matter how good you are at chess, they just knock over the pieces, poop on the board, and then strut around like they won.”
The idea that this meme attempted to convey was how frustrating it can be to pin Christians down in an argument. No matter what, according to the Christians, God is always good and prayer always works. Whenever a Christian prays for something, and then it happens, he’ll say, “God heard my prayers; He is so good!” But when he prays for something, and it doesn’t happen, he’ll say, “It wasn’t His will, but He’s still so good!”
And honest skeptics are left to wonder, “If Christians believe prayer ‘works’ even when it doesn’t ‘work’, then what’s the point of prayer?”
Whenever we find ourselves asking, “What’s the point of prayer?” it’s important that we check our hearts and examine our motives. Oftentimes, what we’re really asking is, “Why won’t God do what I tell Him to do? If God would do what I tell Him to do, I might consider believing in Him, but I can’t believe in a God who refuses to cooperate with my plans for the world.” I fear that, for most people who ask questions like this one, the problem isn’t that prayer doesn’t work. It’s that when you spend your whole life basically expecting to get whatever you want, you’re bound to think that the only way prayer can really work is for you to get your way.
The only scenario in which prayer should work that way is the one in which you’re God, and the God of the Bible is subordinate to you. People sometimes talk about God and prayer like we’re the parents and God is the disrespectful teenager with a mind of His own. We try to tell Him what to do, but when He refuses to listen, we throw our hands in the air and say, “Why do I even bother? You’re gonna do whatever you want.”
You’re free to believe in God, or not to believe in God. But if God is real, He’s the Parent, and we’re the kids, not the other way around.
Jesus openly acknowledged the same kind of question we’re wrestling with here. “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” (Matthew 6:5-8)
OK – so God knows what we need before we ask. So don’t bother asking, right?
By no means! Check out what Jesus said next: “…your Father knows what you need before you ask him…This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.’” (Matthew 6:8-13)
What was Jesus’ point? Your Father knows what you need, but ask anyway. Why? Because your Father wants you to. Blaise Pascal wrote that “God instituted prayer to grant humans the dignity of causality.” In other words, God has decided to invite us into the creative process. He wants us to play a part in creation, and prayer is one of the ways we can play our part.
The cognitive dissonance I hear when people ask, “If God already knows the future, why pray?” is that you could easily apply the same logic to anything we do to try and make a difference. If God already knows what’s going to happen in Ukraine, why pray about the war? If God has already decided what’s going to your loved one who is ill, why pray for their healing? The list could go on and on, but the answer is clear and concise. Why pray? Because God has granted us the dignity of causality – the ability to change the course of events – through the power of prayer.
Still, the inquisitive skeptic might wonder, “Does prayer change God’s mind or not?” To which I say, “Who cares?” He’s God, and He’s invited you into the process. That should be enough for us.
If God has already preordained everything and He already knows the outcome, then maybe He preordained you to pray and your prayers will play a part in what God will do. Or maybe your so-called unanswered prayers are going to shape your character today in such a way now that saves you from going through hell later.
After Mother Teresa died in 1997, they found some words scrawled on the wall next to the cot where she slept. They said, “People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are sincere, people may deceive you. Be sincere anyway. What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway. The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway. In the final analysis, it is between you and God.”
To this, I will add, “Sometimes prayer feels pointless. Pray anyway.” Your heavenly Father knows what you need before you ask. Ask anyway. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 4:6-7
