The New Testament book called Acts of the Apostles, which chronicles the life and times of the first-generation Church, introduces us to a man named Barnabas. Actually, his real name was Joseph, and Barnabas was just a nickname. (Jesus and his disciples loved giving people nicknames. Simon Peter was The Rock. James and John were The Sons of Thunder. Thomas was The Twin. James was Tiny. And Joseph was Barnabas).
Barnabas literally meant Son of Encouragement, which tells us something about what Joseph/Barnabas’ friends saw in him.
In the ninth chapter of Acts, the Church leaders called on Barnabas to encourage a young man who had a checkered past. All his life, that man had been a rigid, religious politician, and in recent years he’d become a glorified hitman, sent by the Jerusalem elites to search for Christians and supervise their eradication. That man’s name was Saul of Tarsus, or as he is more widely known today, the Apostle Paul.
When he had come to Jerusalem, he attempted to join the disciples; and they were all afraid of him, for they did not believe that he was a disciple. But Barnabas took him, brought him to the apostles, and described for them how on the road he had seen the Lord, who had spoken to him, and how in Damascus he had spoken boldly in the name of Jesus. So he went in and out among them in Jerusalem, speaking boldly in the name of the Lord. He spoke and argued with the Hellenists; but they were attempting to kill him. When the believers learned of it, they brought him down to Caesarea and sent him off to Tarsus.
– Acts 9:26-30
Paul flew under the radar in Tarsus for the next ten years because he was a wanted man. Meanwhile, the Church kept growing. Antioch was the third largest city in the Roman Empire, and Christianity was blowing up there. But they had no leader with the vision and the capacity to see it through. Barnabas was doing his best there, even though leading the church in Antioch wasn’t his calling.
But Barnabas knew the right man for the job.
News of this came to the ears of the church in Jerusalem, and they sent Barnabas to Antioch. When he came and saw the grace of God, he rejoiced, and he exhorted them all to remain faithful to the Lord with steadfast devotion; for he was a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith. And a great many people were brought to the Lord. Then Barnabas went to Tarsus to look for Saul, and when he had found him, he brought him to Antioch. So it was that for an entire year they met with the church and taught a great many people, and it was there the disciples were first called “Christians.”
– Acts 11:22-26
Notice how, without Barnabas, there may never have been an Apostle Paul. He would’ve been either rejected by the church leaders in Jerusalem, or forgotten and left alone in Tarsus. But Barnabas encouraged the apostles to accept Paul, and then he encouraged Paul to accept leadership of the church in Antioch.
Barnabas brought out the best in people by challenging them and giving encouragement.
How encouraging are you with your friends and family? Do you go out of your way to encourage them? If you’re married, do you encourage your spouse? If you’re a parent, do you encourage your children?
Encouragement is more than feel-good sentimentality.
Encouragement is what it means to be Jesus to your friends.
Understanding how encouragement works will make you a more encouraging person, and there are three stages of encouragement in relationships.
First, encouragement checks in. To be an encouraging friend means you go out of your way to check in with your friends. We’re all busy. We all get stressed out. We all get overwhelmed. The temptation in those moments is to curl up in the proverbial corner and watch Netflix with a bottle of wine. That’s called apathy. Encouragement is the opposite of that. Think about the most encouraging people in your life so far. What did they all have in common? Whenever you’re with them, they put your well-being before your own.
You can be that person for your friends, family, co-workers, and even casual acquaintances. Every day you have the choice to be encouraging, or to be apathetic. Choose encouragement!
Next, encouragement builds up. Building someone up is as simple as saying things like, “You’re good,” “You’re okay,” or “You’re going to be okay.” This is the kind of encouragement that gives a person the sense of security and assurance that, no matter what they’re going through, they will survive it.
Building up your friends also means seeing something in them that no one else does, something they can’t even see in themselves. It’s Barnabas saying to Paul, “Yeah, so you used to be a jerk who killed Christians, and we Christians used to call you the Son of Satan, but I believe in who you are today.”
Have you ever had a friend who saw the best in you, and believed in you, even when no one else did? What difference did that encouragement make in your life’s story? That’s who we’re supposed to be for one another.
Finally, encouragement calls out. This is how real encouragement differs from a Hallmark card. Real encouragement includes conviction and accountability. You won’t find many Hallmark cards that say, “You’re the best friend anyone could ask for, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life, but you should really rethink that man you’re dating and that deodorant you’re using, because you can do better than that.”
Encouragement is NOT sentimental; it holds your friends accountable. It brings an expectation of forward progress and holiness. Think about your closest friendships: is there any level of accountability built into your relationships – or do you just hang out together and have fun together? If you’re just hanging out with your friends, you’re better than that. You and your friends should go deeper than that. You should be intentional about talking about things that matter – your victories and your struggles – and asking for support and accountability. We all need friends who look us in the eye when we miss the mark and say, “You’re better than that.”
Becoming a more encouraging person could have consequences that are eternal for you, as well as your friends, family, and everyone else you choose to encourage. You could be the channel through which God offers grace to others, and by checking in, building up, and calling out, the people you encourage may become the people God meant for them to be, living the lives God meant for them to live.
